Or maybe it does. Like why the hell does the valet talk? He has been chatting on his Bluetooth for about 30 minutes now gesticulating and getting a little too into his conversation. Essentially he looks like some ass-hat warden guarding the doors of this nuthouse.
Then some random female guest with sizeable (read huge) thighs is wearing a mini skirt and boots. It's not even 8:00am. No one is buying what you're selling. Trot on.
I am forced to watch ESPN because I guess there is some big sporting event on television today. I plan on going to see a movie (Revolutionary Road or The Wrestler) and have some drinks later. I suppose I'll have to Boonville Tivo the Superbowl.
I smell an Amber Alert! Who the shit lets their three kids ranging in age from what looks like five to two walk around a huge-ass hotel by themselves? The best thing is if those kids did go missing, I know the parents would think very clearly and calmly before blaming the whole mess on me, the MOD today. "Ma'm, I am so sorry I wasn't keeping a better eye on your children. Sir, I completely forgot that I had to be their surrogate parent while you were hungover this morning."
OMG, the ass-hat valet is now singing James Blunt's "You're Beautiful." Because that song wasn't horrible enough, I guess. He talks and sings and says random things. I can't take this torture.
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