Sunday, February 1, 2009

when the hotel doesn't deliver the lolz...

Or maybe it does. Like why the hell does the valet talk? He has been chatting on his Bluetooth for about 30 minutes now gesticulating and getting a little too into his conversation. Essentially he looks like some ass-hat warden guarding the doors of this nuthouse.

Then some random female guest with sizeable (read huge) thighs is wearing a mini skirt and boots. It's not even 8:00am. No one is buying what you're selling. Trot on.

I am forced to watch ESPN because I guess there is some big sporting event on television today. I plan on going to see a movie (Revolutionary Road or The Wrestler) and have some drinks later. I suppose I'll have to Boonville Tivo the Superbowl.

I smell an Amber Alert! Who the shit lets their three kids ranging in age from what looks like five to two walk around a huge-ass hotel by themselves? The best thing is if those kids did go missing, I know the parents would think very clearly and calmly before blaming the whole mess on me, the MOD today. "Ma'm, I am so sorry I wasn't keeping a better eye on your children. Sir, I completely forgot that I had to be their surrogate parent while you were hungover this morning."

OMG, the ass-hat valet is now singing James Blunt's "You're Beautiful." Because that song wasn't horrible enough, I guess. He talks and sings and says random things. I can't take this torture.

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